Forgive & Forget

In the beginning in the days before time
The light was alive with the essence of power
And from that power were born beings
Who lived on the edge of eternity
And they spread their wings and soared through the ancient air
And the beating of their wings made the winds
And from the winds came the seas
And from the sea came the life of the earth
Nature's cast upon the sea
The winds of past of promise be
Waters deep and cunning
A scheme of sleep as lovers breathe
If you forgive me my ferocity
I won't forget your sweetness
Pull down the night
Lay it before me
Ratify my head with curses
Night recalls tranquility
A curtain falls and sets it free
Darkness calls eternity
Down silent halls the shadows flee
If you forgive me my ferocity
I won't forget your sweetness
Pull down the night lay it before me
Satisfy my head with curses
Forgive and forget
Forgive and forget
Forgive and forget
Fatal cast upon the sea
The winds of past of promise be
Waters deep and cunning
A scheme of sleep as lovers breathe
Forgive and forget
Forgive and forget
Forgive and forget

1. Forgiving is allowing another person to be human for faults, mistakes, or misdeeds. Forgetting is putting these behind you; they are no longer brought up and no longer remain a barrier to your relationship.
2. Forgiving is letting another know that there is no grudge, hard feelings, or animosity for any wrongdoing. Forgetting is the lack of further discussion, with no ongoing negative references to the event.
3. Forgiving is letting the other person know that you accept as genuine the remorse and sorrow for actions or words that hurt or disappointed you. Forgetting is promising that this deed, whether of omission or commission, will not be brought up again.
4. Forgiving is accepting the sincerity of penance, sorrow, and regret expressed over a grievous personal offense; making it sufficient to clear the air. Forgetting is your commitment to let go of anger, hurt, and pain over this offense.
5. Forgiving is giving a sign that a person's explanation or acceptance of blame for a destructive, hurtful, or painful act is fully accepted. Forgetting is the development of a plan of action between the two of you to heal the scars resulting from the behavior.
6. Forgiving is the highest form of human behavior that can be shown to another person. It is the opening up of yourself to that person to be vulnerable to being hurt or offended in the future, yet setting aside this in order to reopen and heal the channels of communication. Forgetting is equally as high a human behavior; it is letting go of the need to seek revenge for past offenses.
7. Forgiving is the act of love between you and a person who has hurt you; the bandage that holds the wound together long enough to heal. Forgetting is also an act of love; in rehabilitation therapy, helping the wounded return to a full, functional, living reality.
8. Forgiving is the God like gift of spiritually connecting with others, touching their hearts to calm the fear of rejection, quiet the sense of failure, and lighten the burden of guilt. Forgetting is the God like gift of spiritually touching others' hearts with the reassurance of a happy and full life with no fear of recrimination, remonstrations, or reminding of past offenses.
9. Forgiving is the act of letting go of temporary ill will, disappointment, or the disgust that arises from the break in your relationship. Forgetting is bridging this gap in the relationship, eventually strengthening it against such a break in the future.
10. Forgiving is an act of compassion, humanity, and gentleness by which you let another know that she/he is indeed a child of the universe upon whom a variety of graces and blessings have been showered and that current or past offenses need not be a barrier preventing goodness and worth to shine through. Forgetting is the act of encouragement, support, and reinforcement by which you assist the other person to rebuild, reconnect and re-establish a loving, caring, healthy relationship with you, others, and the world whereby gifts, talents, and skills are freely appreciated and shared.

Negative consequences of the absences of forgiving and forgetting
Continuously being hurt with pain and suffering going unresolved.
Unresolved guilt and remorse for offenses committed.
Chronically seeking revenge and paybacks from one another.
Being caught up in unresolved anger, animosity, and bitterness.
Defensive, self-protective, and distant behavior.
Blaming, negative and non-growth oriented behavior.
Being stuck in a battlefield stockpiled for future offensive attacks.
Being lost in a festering wound that never realizes the revitalization of healing.
Secretive and non-communicative behavior.
Fear over making a mistake or of having the mistake revealed.
Being overwhelmed by fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of non-approval, low self-esteem, fear of conflict.
High stress.

In order to forgive and forget, you need to practice:
Letting go of past hurt and pain
Trusting in the goodness of mankind
Trusting in the goodness and mercy of God to take over for you
Letting go and letting God lead you during a hurtful time
Believing in God's infinite justice and wisdom
Letting go of fears for the future
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable to growth
Taking a risk
Letting go of hostility and resentment
Working out your anger
Reducing competition
Overlooking slight relapses or steps backward
Developing a personal spirituality
Developing an openness to the belief that people can change
Developing trust in others
Facing conflict head on, resolving it on the spot
Open, honest and assertive communication with others concerning hurts, pains, and offenses experienced
Seeking professional help when necessary to resolve the distance and coldness in a relationship
Recognizing your part or role in setting up hurtful experiences
Identifying and replacing the irrational beliefs that block your ability to forgive and forget

Lack of forgiving and forgetting in a relationship can result in:
Irreconcilable differences between people
Indifference toward one another
An emotional vacuum in which little or no emotions are shown or shared
Chronic attacks or angry outbursts
Addressing or interacting with one another disrespectfully
One-upmanship: competition as to who can out do whom in terms of eliciting sympathy, compassion, or understanding from outsiders
Seeking revenge from one another
Pitting the parties in the relationship against one another through coalitions and taking sides
Chronic recalling and reminding of past hurts and offenses
Suspicions about the others' motives, behavior, attitudes, beliefs
Chronic depression
Chronic hostility
Name calling, belittling and demeaning one another
Responding to present behavior as if they were past behavior
Unwillingness to change and/or unwillingness to seek the help necessary to change

I’m tired, so tired, it’s time to give it up
I’ve been draggin’ his memory around long enough
It’s weighin’ heavy like a stone around my neck
I’ve got to find a way to forgive and forget

Forgive and forget that’s what I’ve got to do
Forgive and forget all the hurt he’s put me through
I know the only way I’ll lay my burdens down to rest
Is if I can forgive and forget

To live in peace, be free of the past
I close my eyes and sweet-dreams is all that I ask
But if I die and peace has not come yet
Write on my stone, I tried to forgive and forget

Forgive and forget that’s what I’ve got to do
Forgive and forget all the hurt he’s put me through
I know the only way I’ll lay my burdens down to rest
Is if I can forgive and forget

Forgive and forget that’s what I’ve got to do
Forgive and forget all the hurt he’s put me through
I know the only way I’ll lay my burdens down to rest
Is if I can forgive and forget

Yeah, I know the only way I’ll lay my burdens down to rest
Is if I can forgive and forget