Sexual Harassment

"Sexual harassment is harassment or unwelcome attention of a sexual nature. It includes a range of behavior from mild transgressions and annoyances to serious abuses, which can even involve forced sexual activity and is a form of abuse (sexual and psychological) and bullying.It includes touching, words or talking, boday language, eye contact, etc.Stalking can also be a method of sexual harassment."
I don't know about other people,but i've encountered sexual harassment for quite many times & most of them happened in public transport, i.e. bus while i was on my way to & from my office. May be we think it happened while the bus was crowded with the passanger,but actually it can also happened when there is not many passanger & if u sit quite isolate from others.
The bus was crowded,i was sitting on the seat when a man standing near me rubbed his groin to my shoulder.May be he has no intention or may be yes.But there were 3 occassions, as far as i can remember, when a guy sat on the seat beside me.Instantly i can feel that something is not right with this guy bcoz' why did he sat beside me whereas there were a lot of other empty seats?I'm not accussing but i can feel it;woman's instinct may be.I was reading a newspaper & all of a sudden, i can feel something was moving on my lap.When i went to check what was it, there was nothing.Then it happened again.This time,i moved a bit to afar from the guy beside me.But then it happened again.Once again i moved until my body touched the bus's wall.This time, i picked a look at my lap & i saw a hand was touching & rubbing my lap. I gave a sharp look to the guy's face.What made me mad was he looked straight to the front with both his hands hugging his body, like there was nothing happened.
If this happened to u, what will u do?Will u just ignore it?Or will u react by screaming for help?May be some of us just ignore it like there's nothing happen, hoping u'll reach ur destination ASAP or he'll left u alone eventually or he reaches his destination b4 u.U just don't want to create a scene.U don't want to embarras urself bcoz' u don't know whether other prople will take notice & come to ur rescue.
That's what i've done b4.I just ignore bcoz' i was so afraid.On one incident, while i was also in the bus on my way home, suddenly this girl stood up abruptly while mumbling.Then she screamed to the bus driver to do something bcoz' a guy beside her harassed her.U know what happened?All the passengers including the driver did nothing.They just stared at the guy & as always,the guy acted like there's nothing happened.Such a heartache.
So,that's why many of us,including me just keept quiet.But that what i did long time ago bcoz' i've no caourage to face the harasser.It made me felt guilty & angry.I used to ask myself,of all the people in that place,why did he choose to harass me? What have i done?Was it something i wore?Or was it something about me that made me as a target?When i kept on thinking about it, it made me angry;why didn't i've the gut to stop the harassement?Why didn't i did something about it?It made me felt there was something deep inside my heart was going to burst out.After that,i leraned a valuable lesson.I've to stop the act nest time around.I've to be brave to protect myself.If i didn't protect myself,then who will?Other people will just see.
From that on, when the harasement happened again,i'll stood for myself whether i scolded & warned them or i acted physically.There was one ocassion, also in the bus.I sat beside the window & the bus was crowded.There was a man sat beside me.Once he took a seat,i instantly took precaution & in alert as he sat too near until touching my body.at first,i can compromise as it was really crowded in there & he may be had to move closer to me to give space to the passengers standing near him.But of all of a sudden,i can feel something was touching my belly.At first,i thought he has no intention to do so,may be it was an accident.& he look gentleman, wearing office atire,carrying a briefcase.But the more i moved towards the bus's wall,he kept on closer to me & now i can feel the touching on my lap.I glanced towards my lap & i saw the thing that was moving & rubbing my lap was his hand.At first i stared straight to his sweating face (the bus air-cond was too cold to be sweated) & warned him about his doing.He stopped for awhile.But then he started again.No one noticed his action as there were too many people & he hid his hand under his briefcase.
After the second warning, i can't hold myself anymore.I've to stop this.I was really angry at that time.Without second thought, i took my heel & hit straight to his head.I didn't care if other people saw my action bcoz' i knew they just didn't care of what had happened to me.At first,he didn't reacted.After asking him if he wanted another feel of my heel, he started to show his shocked & said he did nothing.He stood up, pressed the bell & got off the bus whereas the main bus station was up ahead.I saw he walked on foot towards that bus station.If he really did nothing, why did he got off the bus all of the sudden?It means he's guilty & that what most of these harassers did when their doing has been traced; they'll get off the bus ASAP.
I was amazed by my reaction.I never thought i'll act physically like that.Luckily he didn't reported me & i'm sure he won't unless he asked for trouble. My fiance saluted my action.Actually i'm tired of doing nothing & keep the guilty feeling of doing nothing to myself when the harassement happened.Actually it wasn't the first or the last.If these harassers ignore my warning (i always give 2nd chances), i'm not afraid to do the same thing again.I guess my heel has save the day.It was a signal;don't mess with me.
My advice, don't be afraid to react to ur harassers.If u keep on ignoring & hoping the harassers will stop by themselves,u're wrong bcoz' these harassers won't & they'll think u're enjoying the harassement & keep on harassing,not only u but also others.Don't just asuming that it happens to u only that day;once bcoz' u'll never know if u'll face these harassers again in the future.
U should stop of what they're doing.If u're not brave enough,stop them by avoiding them at once,for example changing place or find a place with the crowd.If u've a bit of gut, try voices out ur anger straight to their face as a warning.& if u're barve enough like me, beat or hit them with whatever u have on that time as a protection.Umbrella is a good & useful 'weapon',apart of ur heels & handbag.If u've strong hand,why don't u punch straight to their face or groin;their most weakness area.But make sure u don't kill them.So,the harassers out there,watch out!Stop urself for being a victim.Show them who u're.Show them u're not as weak as they think/look.Don't suffer in silence for something than can be stop.