Changes

The above poem says a lot about what I'm thinking today.Everything changes;a bit @ a lot;fast & slow;from bad to good,from good to better,from better to best or from bad to worse,from worse to worst.Vice versa.Things(people) change whether we realize or not.Changes give us a new perspective in our life.We need to change for a better future.Nobody can force us to change becoz' forcing someone @ something to change can make them feel involuntarily @ reluctant.
For me,i don't like to be forced to do something.I like to do at my own pace.When people force me to change,I'll do it for a short time @ i just act in front of them but whenever there's no people around,I'll turn to the old me.
Actually i was very mad yesterday 'till today.I thought he has changed especially after the incident.I was the happiest person on earth when he said a lot of good things after the releasement.He said he want to change becoz' he has thought a lot during his imprisonment.He didn't want to live like b4.He wanted to get a better job so that he can marry me as soon as possible.He wanted to make me happy.He didn't want to trouble his family & people around him anymore.We have planned many things especially our future.We didn't want to like this anymore;kais pg mkn ptg.We want to settle all our debts.
He promised to a better man.

Send someone to love me

I need to rest in arms

Keep me safe from harm

In pouring rain

Give me endless summer

Lord I fear the cold

Feel I'm getting old

Before my time

As my soul heals the shame

I will grow old through this pain

Lord I'm doing all I can

To be a better man

Go easy on my conscience

'Cause it's not my fault

I know I've been taught

To take the blame

Rest assured my angels

Will catch my tears

Walk me out of here

I'm in pain

As my soul heals the shame

I will grow old through this pain

Lord I'm doing all I can

To be a better man

Once you've found that lover

You're homeward bound

Love is all around

Love is all around

I know some have fallen

On stony ground

But Love is all around

Send someone to love me

I need to rest in arms

Keep me safe from harm

In pouring rain

Give me endless summer

Lord I fear the cold

Feel I'm getting old

Before my time

As my soul heals the shame

I will grow old through this pain

Lord I'm doin' all I can

To be a better man

But the promises just gone like a wind.For the first month he really change in terms of behaviour.He thinks positive in anything.He wants to forget the past.But once he came back to KL,he change back into the his old behaviour.He planned a lot but he didn't do anything to take his plans into reality.He wants to work but still didn't know what kind of job he want,he has no initiative to find job.He always told me to go find the job but then there're always excuses.He wants to save money but he still didn't want to work.He knew that my salary was small & only can afford both of us for food & drinks,house rental & transport to work.But then he always spend the many unwisely.I didn't know where have the money gone.In the middle of the month,my salary turns zero.

I have to forget my keinginan.Like other normal working people (girls), i do have a lot of things to buy.I want new cloths,shoes,make-up.But the dreams become a dream.