FaCtS Of LiFe

♥ You're not best friends because you sit together at LUNCh or taLK on the phone, or have matching fLiP-fLOPS or can recite each others Wardrobe. You're bestfriends because when she smiles, a grin forces itself across ur face no matter how mad you are, when she cries you instantly feel her pain and want to cry with her. When you Look her in the eyes you know theres no one you could ever tryst more regardLess of how many broken hearts you've had. That's what it means to be best friends...♥

Wedding Anniversary

Daisypath Anniversary Years Ticker

Friday, February 29, 2008

Happy Leap Year

Which/Who Is Your Choice?


Know what,girls 'always' talk about man of their choice.They want like this,want like that.I have friends who like to talk about it.Most of them have their own criteria.And most of them want a handsome guy as their partner.But what do handsome means to them?How can we describe as handsome?Is it face like Brat Pitt or Tom Cruise or Salman Khan?
I just can say that handsome is universal.Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.Maybe one person is handsome in our eyes but not so so in others eyes.There's a friend of mine who falls for Mawi,AF champion,look.She want to find her partner with Mawi's look.But sorry to say,for me,Mawi is nothing.Mawi is not handsome in my eyes.When i said that,she felt irritate.But who should blame us?Mawi's features are handsome for her but not for me.Maybe a a handsome guy for me is not someone that she prefered.
There's occasion when we bump into a guy.She would scream (luckily no one hear us becoz we're in the car) bcoz' she thought the man was so handsome & it's wonderful if she can have him.Oh no,once again,he's not my type of man i look for.
Sorry to say,i don't fall for someone's look.It doesn't mean that i'll accept everything but just enough 'sedap mata memandang'.Honestly i feel that look will fade through time.That's why i feel that the most important is who the man is.Sometimes people used their look to cheat/trick other people.Actually,i've encounter this situation (even though it happened to my close friend).One occasion,my friend really desperate to have a boyfriend after she was dumped by her ex.She said she was lonely & can't live w/out a man.Less than 3 months after that,she meet this man.I admit,this man was handsome & softspoken.My friend was very proud to have a handsome partner.
But the truth came.Actually he's jobless & married with 3 children (the 4th one is coming).We're very shocked.I just couldn't believe it bcoz' avtually he just want to have fun with girls.He just want to use her as his banker (she loaned her money to him but eventually didn't get back).After she realized who's the man,he just go missing.We as her friends decided to test this man.We contacted him thru his YM & got a very feedback.From this we knew that he used his look to cheat.We don't even know how many girls have been cheated by him & how many will be his next victim.
The 2nd occasion happen to my best friend.She has a handsome bf.Everyone said she was very lucky to have him.They coupled for almost 4 years but then he married to another girl.He said no word about his marriage.There's no bye bye from him.Actually he said that he've been forced by his family to marry his wife but the truth've been reavealed by his friend.He've been coupled with his wife for quite sometimes but my friend didn't realized bcoz' they bcinta jarak jauh.The man was in KL & his wife is in JB.She was cheated 'hidup2'.She was used as his 'sparepart',to ease his loneliness in KL bcoz' his true gf was farway.Like my friend,she has spend a lot of money for him.When she knew the truth,she tried to ask back her money but he keeps avoiding her 'till this day.He just disappeared into thin air.He evacuated his rented house,left his job & changed his hp no.
After she was dumped & cheated (more than a year),she found another man but this time she didn't look for look anymore.This time this man is not handsome at all (she's the one who said like that but honestly,mmg x handsome).Why?Bcoz' she feel that handsome & good looking man only want to 'main2'.So,she was serik to fall in love with handsome man anymore.Biar tak handsome,jnji hati baik.The rest of is another story.
So,i just fed-up when people like to judge others choice.Tengok pompuan tu,eiiii,bf dia x handsome la.Eiiii,nape la laki tu,buta ke?Awek dia mcm tong dram.Tak padan langsung.Eiii,pompuan tu dh la x lawa,nape la pakwe dia pilih dia hah?Eiii,pompuan tu dh xde laki lain ke?Pakwe dia tak handsome langsung.These are the words that we always heard.Who are they to judge?What about them?Ingat pakwe diaorg tu handsome sgt ke?Klau pakwe diaorg tu handsome,ingat diaorg tu lawa sgt ke?
Please don't judge other people's choices.We're not in their shoes to judge.They've their own reason for their choices.Maybe their choice is the best for them,not to us but the final decision is theirs.
For some people,the man who want to tackle them should have these criterias.They should be;
(1) handsome (so that they can show off to other people)
(2) rich (so that they can have what ever they want;shopping & dining at luxury place)
(3) have good job (so that their family can show off to their neighbour)
(4) have big car (at least a motorbike so that they don't have to use public transport when go dating)
(5) etc.
Some people put this criteria as a priority.Tak handsome,sorry.
A friend of mine used to ask me to match her with guys bcoz' she want to have a bf like her friends.She feels left out w/out bf.So i tried to match a few guys i've known.But so far,no one has filled up her needs.There's always excuses.Not handsome la,not funny la etc.Sometimes we do have to 'mengukur baju di badan sendiri'.



Thursday, February 28, 2008

Changes


The above poem says a lot about what I'm thinking today.Everything changes;a bit @ a lot;fast & slow;from bad to good,from good to better,from better to best or from bad to worse,from worse to worst.Vice versa.Things(people) change whether we realize or not.Changes give us a new perspective in our life.We need to change for a better future.Nobody can force us to change becoz' forcing someone @ something to change can make them feel involuntarily @ reluctant.
For me,i don't like to be forced to do something.I like to do at my own pace.When people force me to change,I'll do it for a short time @ i just act in front of them but whenever there's no people around,I'll turn to the old me.
Actually i was very mad yesterday 'till today.I thought he has changed especially after the incident.I was the happiest person on earth when he said a lot of good things after the releasement.He said he want to change becoz' he has thought a lot during his imprisonment.He didn't want to live like b4.He wanted to get a better job so that he can marry me as soon as possible.He wanted to make me happy.He didn't want to trouble his family & people around him anymore.We have planned many things especially our future.We didn't want to like this anymore;kais pg mkn ptg.We want to settle all our debts.
He promised to a better man.
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Go easy on my conscience
'Cause it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame
Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Once you've found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around
I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But Love is all around
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man

But the promises just gone like a wind.For the first month he really change in terms of behaviour.He thinks positive in anything.He wants to forget the past.But once he came back to KL,he change back into the his old behaviour.He planned a lot but he didn't do anything to take his plans into reality.He wants to work but still didn't know what kind of job he want,he has no initiative to find job.He always told me to go find the job but then there're always excuses.He wants to save money but he still didn't want to work.He knew that my salary was small & only can afford both of us for food & drinks,house rental & transport to work.But then he always spend the many unwisely.I didn't know where have the money gone.In the middle of the month,my salary turns zero.
I have to forget my keinginan.Like other normal working people (girls), i do have a lot of things to buy.I want new cloths,shoes,make-up.But the dreams become a dream.











LOVE,LOVE,LOVE...


************************♥♥♥************************


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Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Why We All Want To Fall In Love?

We all want to fall in love. Why?
Because that experience makes us feel completely alive,
where every sense is heightened,
and every emotion is magnified.

Our everyday reality is shattered
and we are flying into the heavens.
It may only last a moment, an hour, or an afternoon,

but that doesn't diminish its value,

because we are left with memories
that we treasure for the rest of our lives.
*************************♥♀♥***********************
Why we all want to fall in love?The above poem can describe it all.Every people,young @ old,girl @ boy,normal @ handicap,they all want love.Loves come by itself.Cinta datang tanpa diundang.









Sweet Sacrifice

"Only a life lived for others is worth living"
Sacrifice means to make an offering of something to someone.Most of the time,people sacrificed in hoping to get something back.But the sweetest thing is when we sacrificed without thought of gain.
Many people not ready to sacrifice in many things but they think sacrifice in love is a must.
"To achieve the ultimate love takes the ultimate sacrifice"
The greatest loving relationships exist when both partners love unconditionally. Both are actively thinking of ways to help and please the other, without a thought of what they are getting for it, in return. Each is in the relationship for the welfare of the other, not so that they can feel loved themselves. They are, of course, overjoyed to receive love from the other, but for them, giving love is how they are satisfied, not receiving it.
Sometimes,we have to sacrifice in love so that we can survive.Some people said,they are willing to sacrifice their life for the sake of their love one (in this contact their lover/girlfriend/boyfriend).People said love is blind,make people want to do everything for their beloved.
I can tell you from experience, that even though it can hurt terribly, it is the only way to live.
I have a friend who has sacrificed a lot for the man she loves.Like me,she spent a lot of money,time & energy for him.Many times he hurt her feeling but she's still hoping that that man will love her back.I've told her that man wants her money & body only.But she doesn't care.She believes that as long as she obey him,grant every his wishes,he'll loves her back.Every other day,i've to hear the same excuse for her when that man just ignore her when he got what he wish for.I just knew that the man want to use her only.They're like langit & bumi.The man was good looking but my friend,sorry to say,is an overweight girl.It's hard to find a man who really loves for a girl's heart.Many man especially handsome one will find beautiful girl as their soulmate.Baru padan.They don't want people to laugh at them.The proof is when he only ask her out at nite & went to tpt yg jauh dr org.He tried to avoid his friend when they go out together & he don't want his friend to know their relationship.
I've told her many times to be careful.It's not that i have the right to judge other people but i felt there's something wrong with this man.He always ask her money & then forget about her.When he needs another help,he will come again.But she never serik.Morning she cried for what he did to her,but that night she help him again.
But finally what i tought comes true.It's not that i pray for that but i just knew it.The man left her with an awkward excuse;she's not his type of girl that he wanted to make a girlfriend.My friend dumbfounded.She cried badly becoz' she felt betrayed.She felt that her sacrifices were useless.She felt used.
About me;I've known my fiance for almost 7 years.He was my first love.I felt in love with him instantly after i meet him.Jatuh cinta pandang pertama.But i never ever dare to reveal my feeling towards him.But he knew that i love him so much.Sometimes i feel that he takes me for granted.He always in trouble but i always there to rescue him.I do anything for him.I've sacrificed my time,money,energy because of him.But the thing is,it seems not enough for him.I've never stop sacrifice for him until this day.This morning,he ask my help again.This time he ask for something that i can't give anymore.
Am i mad or desperate for love?No.I love him & i'll love him for the rest of my life even he has hurt me so many times.My love for him is pure.I'll do anything for him but today i know i can't help him anymore.I've come to the dead end.I know,i'm wrong.B4 this,i help him becoz' i felt obligue to help but there is time when i felt that i do anything in order to get his attention.I was hoping that by doing so,he will turn his love for me.And finally i get his love.But i always think positive;he loves me because of who i am not because of what i did for him.Now,i felt worth it after what i did for him.We've have engaged last december & now he dares to speak his love to me.This is what i call sweet sacrifice.
"Only when we give joyfully, without hesitation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means"


Tuesday, February 26, 2008

How Does It Feel To Love & To Be Loved???


"Love is patient, Love is kind, Love is not jealous, is not proud.
Is not puffed up, It does not behave badly.
Love does not easily get angry, It does not think evil.
Love does not rejoice in iniquity, But rejoices in the truth.
Love bears all things, believes all things. Hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never Fails."

When someone knows your weakness
But loves you anyway
And they will always be there for you
Each and every day
When someone will stop and listen
When you're feeling low
When someone cares so very much,
So much to let you go
When someone is willing to do without
So your life is complete
And they will give you courage
When you have faced defeat
When someone is this special,
You know they're from above
And there's a place within your heart
Filled with special love
Thank you for everything
I hope these words convey
The love I feel for you
Each and every day.

L.O.V.E. The 4 letter words has many different meanings, from something that gives a little pleasure ("I loved that meal") to something one would die for (ideals, family). It can describe an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or an emotional state.There're many kinds of love. There are many combinations, all of which form some kind of love. Is there passion and friendship but very little commitment? This is defined as "passionate love." Are you committed but feel no passion or friendship? This is called "empty love." What most people ultimately desire, is "TRUE LOVE" the total package: passion, intimacy, friendship and commitment in one healthy relationship. It's the most fulfilling love. It is unconditional, and in my opinion the only "CHOICE". Different people place varying degrees of importance on the kinds of love they receive. According to many philosophers, the only goal of life is to be happy. And there is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved. Love is essentially an abstract concept, much easier to experience than to explain.
A Definition of Love
by
John Wright
Love is unique, wonderful and kind
Its what keeps us going when nothings by our side
From soldiers on the battlefield
To children sitting here at school
Love is the power
An everlasting toolLove is undefeated
The heavyweight champ
Nothing can defeat it
Cause it cant be knocked down
Many do impersonate it
Like infatuation and lust
But only one is love
How marvelous to us
Some of us are sure of it
And some have our doubts
But no matter what
It always helps us out
Its by our side all our life
And in our hearts and minds
The only thing different
Is how we spend the time
Some of us love people, animals, or earth
Some of us love hatred, bloodshed, and cruelty
Love can be evil, innocent, or mild
Whatever it is?
Love is one of a kind
Love isn't always an easy road to traverse when two persons are involves. It is sometimes the cause of one of the sharpest growing pains that most of us have to experience. Love is the most powerful human lesson you are ever to learn. It is a purposeful interdependence through which you become so much more than on your own. Once you can understand that love is not something to be found, rather it is in you to be shared, you can love wholeheartedly without fear. Don’t turn your back on love every time it touches you, because when you give up on love you give up on yourself.
"Love wasn't put in the heart to stay, for love isn't love 'till you give it away."
Just because you feel love doesn't mean the other person does! You should know the difference between love, infatuition and lust. Give it time. Love takes root slowly and grows with time. Infatuation grows into full bloom almost immediately. Love is not about giving or receiving gifts but about sharing each other’s feelings and letting each other know how much you really care. You need to be romantic, creative, and unique. The best way to show someone you really care is by words and how your actions make them feel special. You need to say something coming from the heart and show them from your soul. Love them for who they are and not for who you are.
"Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the rules. Then you must learn to play from the heart."

Rules to love & to be loved;
1. To truly love is to give and expect nothing in return. This makes it a giving - giving relationship when both think this way.
2. Do not be afraid to give and show your love, understand and respect each other's feelings and emotions. Remember our hearts are fragile and feel everything.
3. Don't end it if they don't say it back. Nothing says both parties fall in love at the same time, continue to love them and when it's right for them, they'll say it back.
4. Do not change yourself just to please the one you love, it will only make you feel used. And if the one you love cannot love you for who you are, maybe he wasn't the one meant for you.
"Love is like a butterfly, hold it too tight and it'll crush, hold it too loose and it'll fly away."
Finding your own happiness starts and ends with you. Love can make you happy, or it can cause you pain. Loving someone that loves you back is the goal of every relationship. Never take for granted that love is understood. Show and tell the people you care about exactly how you feel. Sometimes the ones you care most for are the ones you neglect the most. It's easy to forget about the feelings and aspirations of those closest to you as you move around them daily and sometimes take them for granted. Appreciation of their presence in your life is always something worth stopping for, to take the time to reflect over and will rejuvenate the strength of your relationships.
  • You can be loved even if you are not perfect
  • You can be loved while keeping your course in life
  • You can be loved without getting lost in love
Stages of love:
Ecstasy - when love rocks
Stability - when love rolls
Monotony - when love lulls
Uncertainty - when love keeps you guessing
Misery - when love stinks
Clarity - when love shines
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn. Is to love and be loved in return."
Just...

They say that destiny you can not change
And all must come the way it will
And all the happiness and pain in life
Are nothing else but events in your life
Sometimes is hard and your heart brakes
When all the things you hoped for in life
Turn to illusions as time goes by
And you are left lonely to cry at night

But please have hope–I know it's hard
That live shall change for you with time
And one day soon–of maybe now
Destiny is writing of love in your live

Just keep your hope and open heart
You never know what is waiting in life
Tomorrow will come and by the destinies will
Tomorrow you may find–the love of your life.
by Mike Wolan
"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."
Lao-Tzu

Monday, February 25, 2008

A Very Bad Monday

I'm really mad today.Semlm aku dh bdamai dgn cik abang.Everything went well the whole day untill early this morning.As usual dia x bleh tidur.And as usual aku jd mangsanya.Aku dh la mengantuk giler.Mlm semlm aku dh tidur lewat sbb temankan dia.Ingatkn bila hari minggu bleh la tidur lama sikit,malangnya 6.00am dia dh kejutkan aku.Mintak tolong aku buat breakfast & air teh panas.Katanya nnti dh abis breakfast bleh la aku sambung tidur blik.Dlm keadaan mengantuk & tpaksa,aku bangun buat breakfast.Sdg aku goreng cekodok,dia smpai bawa ikan,suruh aku masak ikan singgang.Dh abis breakfast,terus bersihkan ikan & masak utk lunch.Nasi dh masak,dia ajak aku lunch terus.Baru pkul 11.30am.Abis lunch,kna kemaskn dapur yg bsepah.Lepak2 kejap.Baru nk lelapkn mata,dia nk makan lg.Baru 2.30pm,dh 2nd round.Tpksa la temankn dia.Aku siapkan buat bunga utk cenderahati kahwin nnti.Sedar2 dh 6.00pm.Baru boleh lelapkn mata.Aku tengok dia nyenyak.Syukur,bleh aku tidur dgn aman tnpa gangguan.
Tiba2 aku dngar suara dia kejutkn aku.Rupanya dh 7.30pm.Terus bangkit,masak nasi utk dinner.Smbil tu gi cuci koridor,toilet,bilik air & basuh baju.Abis mandi,dia terus ajak aku dinner.Abis dinner,lepak2,kemaskan pakaian yg dh kering,baca paper semlm.Dia as usual cuba lelapkn mata tp tlena skejap jer.Boring betul sbb takde perkara lain yg bleh dibuat.Tv baru jer rosak.Semenya gara2 dia.Ari tu remote control rosak.Bila dh repair,kuar plak ntah apa2 kt skrin tv.Aku dh ckp biar je la kt situ sbb x mganggu sgt pandangn puntp dia degil.Tekan itu,tekan ini.Last2 tv tu terus mati,x kluar gambar & suara.Nsib baik dia yg rosakkan,klau aku yg buat,maunya kna bebel 6 guni.Jawabnya tunggu ada duit bru bleh repair tv tu.Bila?Ntah la...
Since xde duit,radio buruk yg jd peneman.Tp tu la,radio dh condemn.Channel ttentu jer yg dpt.Tu pn skejap ok,skejap x ok.Tp ok la drpd sunyi sepi.
Dia minta aku dodoikn dia spy dia bleh lelap.Dia x bg aku tidur dulu dgn alasn dia x bleh nk tidur klau aku tidur dulu.Masalahnya amik masa lama nk dodoikn dia.Masalahnya dh pkul 3am.Esok aku nk kna bangun awal sbb aku keje.Dia xpe la,duduk rumah jer.Klau aku x cukup tidur,cmner aku nk buat keje?Dia ni tak faham2.Bila aku salah ckp ckit,dia dh naik angin.Dia suruh aku tidur dulu,tak payah dodoikn dia.Siap hempas2 pintu lg.Aku nk tidur pn tak lena.Bengangnya!
7.30am bru aku bangun.Pkul 6am aku dh jaga tp aku tak larat nk bangun.Lepas gosok baju,aku masak behoon soup utk dia.Dia yg pesan mlm td.Sdg aku masak,tiba2 dia dtg ke dapur,marah2 kt aku,larang aku buat soup tu.Tak faham aku.Semlm suruh buat,hari ni marah plak.Aku pegi keje dlm keadaan perut kosong.Takde mood aku nk breakfast.Dia suruh pakai cincin tunang tp aku buat tak tahu jer.Aku malas.Takde mood.
Sampai opis dh pkul 10.00am.Jenny call,katanya en md noh call mr yap,complain pasal aku dtg lmbt lg.Dia & anaknya dh tunggu lama kt bawah sbb tak bleh msuk opis.Asyik2 nk complain.Bosan aku!Aku ni dh la tgh bengang,smpai opis kna complain plak.Cepat2 la dpt keje baru,aku dh bosan keje kt sini.Dulu xde org nk complain,skrg ada tukang complain x bertauliah plak.Hari ni btul2 aku bad mood.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Friends For Life

Suddenly, i just don't know why, i keep dreaming of my old friends lately.I realized, nowadays, i lost contact with all my friends.B4 this, i have a few good & really closed friend from uni.I must admit that i've lost contact with all my friend from school since i entered UUM.Further more, only 2 of us entered uum & all my other friends entered uia, um or kusza.We're going different way.But then, now i keep losing my friend from uni too.Most of all, bcoz they've entered a new different world,i mean,they already married,so no time for single friend like me any more.Midah,achik,eza,nor,mek nor,just named a few,married already.B4 this,i like to write letters to a few my best buddies,sara,baity,anne,rocky.But then,since i came to KL,i'm very lazy to write anymore & all of them have disappeared.Don't know why.Maybe they've married also but i haven't reaceived any invitation card from them.
Only za & rocky left.S'times i keep exchanging sms with rocky & whenever i balik kg,i tried to meet her at her house since we're living nearby.I've known her since the medical check-up day in HKT.Then left za.She's the only one who work & live here in KL(selangor).We used to contact each other.S'times she came to KL just for lepak2 & chit chatting.Furthermore, we're the only single lady in our group.We keep teasing each other;who's going to get married first & who will be left behind.But then she engaged with Mamat in Dec'2006.I felt very happy for her eventhough i know that i'm going to be the last person in our group get married.I felt happy for her bcoz finally she's ready to accept another man in her life after being cheated & dumped by her former boyfriend,Zam.
We went together to Semua House to find her things & decorations for her engagement hantaran.She looked very excited even though i knew that she's a little bit upset & worried about Mamat.Actually Mamat is a married man.On that time,he's in the process of divorcing his wife.I'm a little bit worried too bcoz she kept secret about mamat's status from her family.I'm the only one knew about his position.I knew that her family won't accept mamat bcoz of his status.I knew most of parents didn't want their daughters to bmadu.Too many bad things from good things.So, that's why she kept it as a secret.Further more,he just an ordinary guy with a low qualification & not so stabil job.I understand if her family can't accept him bcoz they're not a very ideal couple in terms of looks,status,qualification,jobs etc.She's a graduate with a stabil & good job.She's good looking & looks young even though she's already 33.She has a car & most of all, she's still anak dara.
But then, the engagement ceremony went on well despite of the secret.He came to trganu with his god family.His own family didn't come bcoz they want to jaga hati his wife even though on that time he already divorced his wife (o/side the court) .Then, the ribut came.A few days after that she knew that he already get back to his wife the day b4 the engaged.She's very mad & explode during that time.Then,don't know why,he divorced her wife once again.Za's life became very miserable but she decide to get married with mamat no matter what.She said she didn't care eventhough after this mamat get back to his wife.She didn't care eventhough she has to live alone after married to mamat.S'times i'm surprised myself with za.Why she did want to suffer her life living with mamat?Why she's ready to live on her own despite having a husband?Why?She has a lot of other choices.She can break the engagement & if she has to live alone after that,it's ok bcoz she has no string attached.She can do whatever she wants.If she live alone after getting married,i really believed that she's even more suffer.What's the meaning of getting married & having a husband if we have to live alone, by ourself?A husband should protect us as his wife,by our side through the good times & the bad times.S'times,sorry to say,i felt that za is desperate to get married.I understand that we're in the mid 30's.People can call us anak dara tua (Andartu or andalusia).Our biology clock is clicking very fast.But then,why should we sacrifice our life & future to shut other people's mouth?
I understand what she felt bcoz' i'm facing the same situation eventhough i'm younger than her (only 1 year difference).S'times i also felt very lonely.Our friends seem forgetting about us.Mentang2 kitaorg still single.I keep thinking why did the kept away from us?Maybe they're buzy with their new life.Or maybe they're afraid we'll snatch their husband?Hahaha...nonsense!I admit that i felt jealous when i see my friends have their own family;good husband & lovely children.I keep thinking,when will i have the same life,having my own family?S'times i felt upset when people (especially our family) kept asking,when we're getting married?Every time we balik kg,we heard the same question.Whenever our family members especially younger than us are getting married,people kept whispering.It seems that we're not laku.There's time when we start to keep away from any family gathering bcoz we're tired to listen the same question.
It's not that we're very choosy.We only look for a responsible and honest man to be our soulmate.We don't care if he's only a spm holder.We don't care if he's only a kuli.We don't care if he doesn't own any vehicle.We don't care if he has an average look.The most important things,he can make us happy.But nowadays,men tends to very choosy themselves.They looked for the girls who have at least a diploma or degree,have a very good & professional job,own a car,received large salary & most important things,beautiful & sexy.
I can't hide my feeling when za's weding date is coming.I think what will be happen to me b'coz after this,i'm going to be the only one left singlehood.She promised to keep in touch with me but that's what our married friends said b4 getting married.Eventhough i've a steady boyfriend on that time(now he's my fiance),i still don't know the future.But,i still happy for her.Whenever she told the argument & misunderstanding between her & mamat,i told her to be patient bcoz' that is the challenge faced by engaged couple.I felt something is happen between them but then i don't dare to ask her.She kept telling me her doubts & worries.
Then,a musibah happened to me & zaki.He was caught two days b4 hari raya.He was acused of owned a stolen motorcycle.During that time,i felt very hopeless.My life turn upside down.I couldn't eat,i couldn't sleep,i couldn't concentrate on my job.But there's always hikmah di sebalik musibah.Bcoz' of the tragedy,a day b4 raya haji,we engaged.The plans was very short & last minute but the outcome was very splendid.Everyone,my & his family was very shock with our decision bcoz' of the shirt notice.Our ceremony was not big but cheeful.
A few days after raya puasa,i told za my plan of getting engage. A few days b4 my engagement,i told za again but she seems not very happy.Not as happy as i am when she's getting engaged.I went to select & bought my hantaran by myself b'coz she seems not able to come along with me.Actually a few days after raya puasa,za told me she has break their engagement.I was really shock bcoz' b4 raya she told me mamat is coming to his house in trganu to discuss about their wedding.The wedding was plan on dec'2007.I didn't know what had happened.She only told me mamat has got back to his wife for the 2nd time a few days b4 raya.And now all her family members knew about him,his status.Promptly her family asked her to break the engagement.She was scolded of keeping the secret all this time.Her father was not agreed to accept that kind of son-in-law.They felt she's being used by that man.No used of getting married to an uncertain mind person bcoz' he kept changing his decision.
So,she had to break the engagement even though she didn't want to.She was forced by her family & it's out of her willingness.All her friends accept me agreed & support her tindakan.Mamat has asking her forgiveness and ready to responsible for waht he did.He want to marry za & she's ready to accept him & his forgiveness.But what make me uncomfortable with her decision is,she kept saying she felt sorry & pity for him.She said people always bullied him,so by getting married to him,she can help him.Oh no,what had happened to my friend?She want to marry this man bcoz' of kesian?People married bcoz' of love, affection, adoration, devotion,passion.We lied to ourself if we accept other people bcoz' we felt pity.It's like we're not being honest to the person.I can't believe za is thinking like this.I've known her since 1995.We're close during our 2nd year in uum & we're getting very close since we came to KL.I knew her.She was very strong & firm with her decision.It's hard to bully her.She did what she said.She kept her word.She's an extrovert person,very assertive & confident.It's hard to see her depressed,gloomy or unhappy.
After the incident,she seems to be introvert.She talked less.She seems very sad & letarghy.She start to keep herself away from other people.She has changed.Now i undertsand when people said love can change oneself.She said,now she didn't want to think about anything bcoz' now she lived under others decision.I'm quite suprise when she said that she never complain or criticize her friend's choice.It's she mad at me becoz' of what i said?I just said that her family decision was right bcoz' it's clear that mamat is not firm with his decision.He has divorced his wife 2 times & keep getting back to her when his family pressured him.Can za lived with that kind of man for the rest of her life?What's the meaning of marriage if to be left afterward?What's the point of married to be called a janda after that?What about her family?When we get married to someone,means that we married to his/her family.The problem is,his family seems cannot accept za bcoz' his former wife is his family choice.Erm.....headache2...
I didn't condemn mamat.I just said what i think.I felt mamat should stick to one decision.He should choose either her or his wife.Mamat can't choose both bcoz' he cannot afford it.I don't want za to be used afterward.B4 this,he's using her name to buy a motorcycle(but the motor was stolen 2 weeks after that).She has to pay the loan herself.Then,she's the one who support him when he didn't received any salary.She's the one who cook for dinner or lunch for him to make sure he saved his pay.She let him used her car to work & also send & fetch his former wife.So,can he support two wives with his condition?Surely he can't.Surely za has to help him.I don't want her to be used.If what i said is wrong,i'm really sorry.After all,i'll support whatever her decision.
But,she seems to remote herself.She haven't called me for quite sometime.She didn't answer my massage.She didn't reply my YM even though i know she's online on that time.She didn't congratulate me & share her happiness for my engagement.She didn't say a word about my engagement.I'm sad becoz' she seems didn't care.My friend said maybe she felt jealous of me.Why should she felt like that?I never felt jealous when she engaged last time.Maybe she felt sad bcoz' i'm engaged whereas she just break-up.I know that after grad from uum,she always lucky compared to me.She got her first job instantly upon graduation whereas i've to menganggur for a year even though i grad first.She got her present job with a good salary whereas i still strive to get a better job till this day.She got her first boyfriend a year b4 i knew my fiance.She engaged whereas i still don't know where i am in the man's heart.She bought her first car & then change to a better car whereas i still can't afford it.She own a canggih handphone & credit card whereas i still not eligable to have one.
But then,she broke-up with her first boyfriend whereas i'm still with the same boyfriend.Then,she broke her engagement during my engagement.I'm planning my wedding right now whereas she's still struggle with her problems.Does it these make her jealous of me?
Whatever happened,i still love her as a friend.She has helped me a lot.I've troubled her a few times but she kept forgive me.We shared a lot of secret,going through good & bad times together.We keep supporting & console each other.But now,i don't know how to talk to her bcoz' i'm afraid i'll say something that will make her sad & kecik hati.I want to share my happiness but i don't know how.Let the time heals her heart.......
"In the right light, at the right time, everything is extraordinary"

Saturday, February 23, 2008

I'm Sleepy

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Huarghhhh.....ngantuknya. Ni seme gara2 cik abang. Dia yg x bleh tidur, aku yg kna bjaga sama. Actually sejak incident kehilangn dompetnya & incident dia tserempak dgn kwn lama dia, dia dh kna penyakit insomnia. Dh byk mlm dia x bleh tidur. Klau lelap pn, sekejap2, asyik tjaga.
Mlm td after dinner, dia ajak aku lepak. Klau diikutkn aku sgt mengantuk + penat tp bla tengok keadaan dia, kesian plak aku. Nak x nak kna la temankn dia. 10.30pm kitaorg jln kaki gi chow kit. Pusing2 kt area balai bomba chow kit, cuci mata. Meriah gak chow kit ni ye pd wktu mlm. Ramai org lepak & byk gerai samada gerai mkn maupun gerai jual brg2 spt handbag (tiruan), pakaian & mcm2 lg. Then kitaorg lepak kt restoran mamak, pekena roti canai + kopi 'o' panas sambil tengok tv. 11.30pm kami beransur2 pulang. Smpat lg beli jagung rebus, mkn smbil jln. Abang aku ni mmg kaki mkn.
Smpai umah dh nearly 12.00am. Aku dh ngantuk giler tp dia ajak aku sembang2 lg. Nearly 2.00am bru aku tidur. Dh x sedar apa2 dh. Sedar2 pkul 6.30am dia kejutkn aku, ajak gi pasar kt bawah. Konon2nya nk tunjuk kt aku keadaan pasar tu. Erm, ni seme silap aku sbb aku prnh minta dia ajak aku skali klau nk gi pasar tu sbb aku x prnh gi wp dekat. Senang la lps ni klau aku nk beli apa2, x pyh nk gi chow kit @ singgah kt giant. Tp masalahnya aku ngantuk giler ni tp tpaksa bgn gak sbb dia 'merengek' ajak aku. Rupanya dia tidur 3 jam jer td, tu pn asyik tjaga jer. Cuci muka, tukar baju, trus gi pasar. Bukan org tau pn aku x mndi. Pusing2 pasar tp beli udang jer, dia nk buat nasi goreng cina. Aku tukang makan jer.

Ikutkn hati malas nk gi keje ari ni tp since dh jnji dgn wilson semlm, kan gi jugak. Smpai opis dh pkul 10.30am. Erm, lewat lg. Wilson & Dayah dh smpai. Ingatkn x byk keje ari ni, alih2 wilson mnta tolong aku edit blik report projek masjid & klang site. Tgelak aku bla baca description pic yg dia ambil. Bhs tbalik kot, lintang pukang, mcm translation dr BI ke BM. Ejaan x pyh ckp la, mmg hancus. Td jnji dgn cik abang nk blik pkul 1pm sbb nk gi pasar beli lauk tp since report blom siap, pkul 3pm bru blik. Smpai umah pkul 4.30pm.

Aku dh la penat, smpai umah kna bebel gara2 blik lmbt. Sometimes aku rasa he's being unfair to me. Aku bukan saja2 nk blik lmbt. Keje byk nk kna siap on the spot. Takkan aku nk biarkn jer.Monday dpn main-con nk meeting, so ari ni kna e-mail,print out & fax copy report tu pd main-con.Smpai umah tkocoh2 disambut dgn muka yg masam + sindirn. Sape x hangin satu bdn?Perut dh la lapar. Dia langsung x nk faham keadaan aku. Aku gi keje, bukan bpoya2 @ mkn angin. S'times aku rasa he's very selfish. Aku dh smpai opis pkul 10.30, takkan 1pm sharp aku nk trus blik sdgkn keje blom siap? Tolong la faham!

Aku tau la dia very grumpy lately sbb x cukup tidur but please consider about me too.Since xde apa nk masak, aku pn buat taik mata. Alih2 dia kejutkn aku sbb lapar. Erm, since aku malas nk bgaduh, aku trus gi pasar, beli lauk. Blik umah, masak ala kadar. Ingtkn x nk mkn masakn aku, tp nasi + lauk tu abis dibedalnya.Erm, tak faham aku......

"It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance"


Friday, February 22, 2008

WHY DO PEOPLE SO MEAN????

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Ari ni bgn awal, sempat goreng behoon utk breakfast. Bas punya pasal, pkul 10am bru smpai opis. Hidayah dh smpai dulu, duk menunggu kt tangga. Biarkan dia duk menunggu. Biar dia rasa.

Actually aku bengang tp ntah kt dia @ bapak dia. Bapak dia bleh ckp aku slalu lmbat hinggakn anak dia ni tpaksa duk menunggu kt tangga. Tp slama dia keje kt sini, ari ni bru aku tengok dia duk menunggu kt tangga tu. Bapak dia bleh salahkn aku sbb dtg lmbt, anak dia kna lepak kt tangga. Tp kebenaran terserlah jua. Semlm jenny ckp, dia dh bleh 'tangkap' pbuatn anak gadis en md noh ni. Kelmarin, aku dh inform awal2 kt jenny yg aku msuk lmbt sbb gi opis accountant dulu. So jenny mai opis awal bukakkn pintu. B4 9am dia dh smpai tp sengaja lepak dgn member dia kt coffee shop kt bawah. Bla dia tnya en md noh bla anak dia akan smpai, bleh dia ckp dr pkul 9 lbih anak dia duk menunggu kt tangga. Pbohong btul sdgkn jenny dh smpai b4 9, tp x nmpak sape2 pn. Actually pkul 10.00++ bru anak dia smpai. Lepas tu bukan nk greet @ tegur jenny. 'itu budak manyak sombong la', ckp jenny. Ntahla, maybe kot sbb dia mmg payah nk bukak mulut. Slama dia keje kt sini pn, beberapa patah ayat jer yg kluar dr mulut dia. Yg slalu aku dengar, 'kak ana, blik dulu', tu jer. Ha, tu la, aku citer x bape nk pcaya. Skrg jenny dh dengar sndiri & lihat dgn mata dia sndiri behaviour budak tu. Jgn plak nnti kluar citer aku yg sengaja reka2 citer. One more thing, jenny complain sbb hp budak tu asyik bbunyi x henti2. Bla masa la dia nk buat keje. Actually aku pn heran gak, hp bunyi non stop, dh la keje x siap2, aku pn tganggu gak dgn bunyi tu. Klau nk keje buat la cara nk keje. Org pn bcinta gak tp ada masanya. Klau company lain, agaknya dh kna sound.

Erm, people always like that. Keburukn org jer yg dia nmpak, keburukn diri sndiri & org yg tdekat x prnh kelihatn. Klau ada pn, buat2 x nmpak. Aku pn heran nape la MN ni mcm nk cari kesilpn aku jer. Aku tau la aku ni anak emas mr yap & jenny (perasan abis....hehehe...). So dia x bleh nk 'sentuh' aku. Apa yg aku buat msti ada org yg backup aku especially jenny. Dulu keje dia terminate staff yg dia x suka, bg memo, reminder & mcm2 lg. Dh ramai staff yg kna terminate sbb dia x puas hati sdgkn dia x bleh terminate aku @ remind aku sbb i'm untoucable. Company ni depends on me 100%. Dia pn slalu suruh aku buat keje2 personal dia. Dulu, kalu dia x puas hati kt staff, dia trus kluarkn memo tp aku dia x bleh buat gitu sbb jenny @ mr yap pn x prnah buat cmtu.

Actually aku pn x fhm dgn MN. Seme staff & bekas staff kt sini x suka kt dia. Salah org jer dia nmpak tp dia x prnh salah. Yus, abg nor, abg salleh (sekadar menyebut beberapa nama yg aku msih ingat), seme kna terminate. Last year mizi, resign. Yg latest, aku dpt tau semlm, radzi, pun dh resign. Actually aku dg agak ini akan blaku. Aku prnh bcakap pjg dgn dia dulu. Bukan aku nk buruk2kn company & boss (Mn tu boss ke?) aku sndiri tp staffyg dia recruit msti x bthn lama. Byk janji2 manis sblom dpt keje tp bla dh keje, buat x tau jer. Bla ditnya, nnti kita bincang, jwbnya. Bla kita x tnya, dia buat2 lupa. Keje last minute, lps tu suka lepaskn diri bla ada masalah. Ksian radzi kna marah2. Dh tau budak tu fresh, xde pengalamn, bidang ni plak bukan bidang dia, so nape msti marah2 bla budak tu buat silap. Impossible budak tu nk blajar seme benda dlm masa x smpai 2 bln. Aku yg dh keje lama ni pn tkial2 lg. So, aku x tkejut bla dia bhenti. Aku rasa seme ni gara2 x menepati jnji. Dia prnh ckp kt aku, dia x kesah kn amarah sbb dia mmg x tau. So dia nk blajar, nk cari pengalaman. Tp yg dia bengang (1) xde org nk ajar dia. Mn suruh tnya technician jkr sdgkn technician tu bukan slalu kt site. Nk tnya MN lg la payah. Dh la jarang2 ke site, bila ajar, mcm robot, nk cepat jer. Bg la org tu faham dulu one by one. Ajar plak mcm nk marah2. Cmner nk pandai. (2) Gaji kecik. Dia ingatkn gaji tu excluding hp bills & petrol, rupa2nya dh including skali. Mn cukup dgn gaji rm800. Dh la nk travel jauh, nk call byk org plak tu. Agaknya dh confirm pn x naik gaji. (3) rumah sewa. Dulu dijnjikn rumah sewa, company tanggung. Ye la, org tu duk kajang, site kt klang, mn larat nk ulang alik. Dh la jauh, petrol plak byk. Nk duk menumpang sedara pn segan lama2. Tp smpai last, isu rumah sewa x selesai, xde rumah. Abis tu, who should blame him over this matter?

Ari ni dpt tau budak bru msuk ganti dia. Start sbtu lepas tp dr smlm x nmpak btg hidung. Wilson ckp, mmg x bleh harap. X tau apa2. Computer pn x tau, apath lg bab2 baca plan & yg sewaktu dgnnya. Sape yg recruit? Sape lg, MN la. Budak yg dia recruit slalu x kekal. Entah la.


Wednesday, February 20, 2008

♪ SELAMAT HARI RAYA ♪

♪♪♪ Selamat Aidilfitri, kpd saudara & saudari, slmt hari raya, hari utk kita bsuka ria, slmt, kami ucapkn, utk kita moga smpai thn dpan ♪♪♪......hehehe
Msti org garu kpala nape aku nyanyi lagu raya sdgkn skrg bln safar, bkn bln ramadhan. Jwpnnya ialah, ada dh abis ganti pose bln ramadhan. So, skrg baru la aku btul2 raya. Ari tu dh raya tp pose blom cukup. Semlm pn bukak pose sakan dgn cik abang. Kbetuln plak kt umah ada pasar mlm, mcm2 beli la. Kenyang 'neting kata org trganu.

Ari ni smpai opis lmbt, pkul 11.00am sbb gi kompleks wilayah jap, jupe alice, akauntan aku. Discuss pasal company account. Lgpn ari ni due date hntar tax form, so nk x nk kna ngadap dia gak ari ni. Penat weh sbb tkejar2.

Smpai jer opis, mcm2 nk kna buat. Surat yg boss suruh draft smlm blom siap lg. Dh siap print nk kna fax plak. As usual kna kejar supplier, mnta quotation. Diaorg klau x buat follow-up, wat senyap jer. Mcm x nk bniaga jer. Aku plak malas nk tnya byk2 kali. Byk lg keje aku (kononnya).


" Don't go looking for love, let it find you because that's why its called falling; you don't mean to..."


Tuesday, February 19, 2008

LIFE GOES ON......

Today ganti pose lg. Klau xde aral, esok dh bleh raya. Raya?Ye la, ari ni ari last aku ganti pose. Ye, raya! Tapi bukannya ada kuih raya pn, sekadar abiskan pose yg tpaksa ditinggalkn bulan ramadhan lps. Ini la lumrah seorg insan yg bgelar kaum hawa, nak tak nak msti kna ganti pose tiap2 thn. Time tak pose tu mmg la happy tp time nk ganti blik tu yg unhappy. Tp dh mmg jd tabiat aku, awal thn jer aku terus ganti pose especially time2 poket tgh kering camni. Drpd blapar lebih baik ganti pose. Dpt pahala, pose pun bganti. Takde la mcm sesetengah member aku tu, esok dh nk pose bln ramadhan, ari ni baru nk abis ganti pose. Takke penat tu? Ganti awal2 kan senang.
Erm, melalut plak aku. Ari ni aku bangun as usual. Tp 10.30am bru smpai opis gara2 bas xde. Bengang giler. Ni la ragam bas 405. Suka2 hati dia jer nk dtg pkul bape. Diaoeg ni tak tau ke org nk msuk opis? Klau kita compalin, diaorg marah blik. Suruh naik teksi la klau nk cepat. Last time aku tengok sorang drebar dgn sorang penumpang tu smpai btekak, siap mcarut gara2 tunggu bas hmpir 3 jam. Sape x bengang tp aku diam jer, malas nk complain, nnti x pasal2 kna bambu dek drebar. Buat malu jer. Mulut penat, hati sakit, muka tebal.
Dh lambat, kna sound dek Jenny sbb bos aku Mr Yap ada meeting dgn PNSB ari ni. Bukannya aku sengaja, dh bas lambat. Dh la hati panas, Jenny plak cakap En Md Noh complain psl aku lambat. Erm, sebab tu la dia tarik anak pompuan dia msuk keje kt sini.
Ni pun satu lg masalah. Aku x kesah dia nk recruit sape pun. Tp dia recruit dgn alasan aku slalu lmbt. Ingatkn bila anak dia keje, ada la org yg buka pintu opis selain dr aku, ada la org lain yg bleh dtg lbih awal dr aku. Erm, aku jugak yg kna bukak. Dia dh la keje 3 @ 4 ari je seminggu. Msuk keje pkul 11.00am. Pkul 1.00pm kuar, pkul 3.00pm bru reti nk msuk blik. 5.00pm sharp dh blah. Ntah keje apa dia buat kt depan tu pn aku x tau. Aku malas nk amik tau. Jenny ckp dia tgh taip BQ tp dr minggu lepas, takkan x siap2. Klau aku, kurang2 2 ari dh bleh siap. No comment. So, Jenny suruh aku catat kedatangan dia. Erm, aku pn hangin gak. Prinsip aku senang. Org x kacau aku, aku takkn kacau org. Tp bla org kacau aku, sndiri mau ingat la. Silap2 aku bleh buat citer mcm2 psl org tu. Hehehe, jahat gak aku yer. Actually aku dh malas nk jd org baik sgt. Boss aku pn slalu ingatkn aku, don't be too nice with other people even with someone close to us. Ni seme gara2 aku kerap kna tipu dek org disebabkn kebaikan aku, sifat lembut hati aku & mudah percaya pd org. Susah gak jd org baik ni kan.
Ari ni budak tu x msuk opis. Ari Selasa & Khamis mmg dia x msuk sbb dia ada kelas. Kira2nya keje part time la ni. Actually aku x nmpak sgt pentingnya nk recruit new staff buat masa skrg sbb keje xde. Aku pn bosan giler ni sbb keje dh kurang. Before CNY ari tu mmg l ax cukup kaki & tgn nk handle sbb seme nk kna siap b4 cuti pjg. Smpaikn ari sbtu pn kna keje smpai ke ptg. Ari2 blik lmbat. Cik abang pn dh bising sbb kna tunggu aku lama utk dinner sama2. Tp skrg, keje dh xde. Duk buat filing jer. Boring2. Apa2 pn, aku kna manfaatkn 'kelapangan' ni dgn sepenuhnya sbb bila keje dh byk nnti, aku gak yg pening kepala. Chowwwwwwwww.......

"Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment"

Monday, February 18, 2008

PTD OH PTD




Hari ni mcm2 nk kena buat. Sib baik smpai awal kt opis. Nk kna buat follow up psl material on site, contact architect projek kt rawang, follow up psl quotation, erm.....tasks go on and on....
Apa2 pun this week dh bleh relax ckit. Bleh baca paper yg x sempat nk dibaca last week, buat filing yg tertangguh, key-in account dlm computer, baca e-mail, update cheq & payment voucher.Erm, rupanya byk gak keje2 yg tertangguh. Ni seme gara2 exam PTD.
Hari sbtu lepas, 16/02, aku attend exam PTD. Sib baik exam tu held dkat umah aku, Hotel Adamson kt Chow Kit. Jln kaki jer. Org pelik gak, nape exam buat kt hotel, ntah la, aku attend jer. Sblom ni exam PTD & yg sewaktu dgnnya diadakan kt skolah. Bagus gak, nmpak kelas ckit, sekelas dgn jawatan tu. Hehehe...perasan aku.
Exam tu bmula pkul 9.00am. Pkul 6.30am aku dh bangun. Siapkan breakfast, gosok baju. Pkul 7.30am breakfast dgn cik abang. Pkul 8.15am aku dh btolak dr rumah. Awalnyer. Ikutkn aku pkul 8.30am bru nk btolak tp cik abang suruh aku awal. Sejak btunang ni, pergi mana2 mesti dia nk hantar @ temankan. Pagi ni pun dia yg offer diri nk hantar aku. So, bjalanlah kami beriringan ke hotel tu. 8.30am dh smpai. Sembang2 sat, then aku menuju ke dewan Sri Kalsom, venue exam tu. Cik abang terus blik sbb nk sambung tidur blik.
Pegawai JPA tu ckp calon pusat tu 200++ tp today 56 org jer yg attend. Erm, kemana candidate yg lain? Nak kata x bminat tp nape diaorg apply? Erm, aku dulupun camtu. Sbenarnya dh byk kali aku apply jwtn ni tp ni 2nd time aku attend exam. 1st time dulu jer aku attend. Tu pun rasanya thn 2001 dulu. Masa tu aku pass exam dia tp kantoi masa kt Assessment Centre. Thn berikutnya aku x attend exam tu wp aku apply post tu. Sebabnya, entah la, agaknya aku frust kot sbb x lulus kot. Then the next coming year, aku mmg x apply langsung jwtn tu. Last 2 years aku start apply blik tp last time aku x attend gak atas sbb2 yg x dpt dielakkan. This year, aku mmg bsemangat nk attend apatah lg venue dia dkat jer, bleh jln kaki.
Preparation ada la ckit, apatah lg aku cbuk bangat dgn keje. Time dlm bas & lrt jer aku sempat belek2 buku sejarah masa form 5 dulu. The rest, aku surf kt internet.
Bhgian 1, exam psl sahsiah diri, soalan kacang jer tp ni seme tpulang pd diri masing2. Jwb secara jujur. Xde yg btul, xde yg salah. 2nd exam, pengetahuan am. Part ni mcabar ckit. 1st soalan pn dh kantoi. Nama panggilan Pulau Batu Putih oleh s'pore. Slalu gak ikuti pkembangn dlm berita tp x peka sgt. Hem, tembak jer. Yg lain2, aku malas nk komen, tawakkal jer. 3rd exam, ni yg aku btul2 kantoi. Math exam. Soalan senang tp x cukup masa. Aku dh la lembab bab congak2 ni, kalkulator plak x bleh guna. Erm, bencinya. 4th exam, soalan kefahaman BM & BI. Ni very the kacang. Confident bleh score. 5th exam, karangn bhs melayu. Goreng jer. Last paper, karangan BI. Goreng gak wp grammar lintang pukang. Nasib la. 4.45pm exam tamat. Blik sorang2 sbb cik abang x jemput. Msti duk mbuta lg ni.
Apa2 pun, aku dh buat yg tbaik, tawakkal jer. Aku pn x mgharap sgt. Actually, aku prefer exam utk 14 Skim Perkhidmatan. Senang ckit + pelbagai jwtn. Exam tu klau x silap akan diadakan pd bulan April ni. Aku mesti attend. Kna buat preparation lbih ckit kli ni.

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